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Expert Tips on How to Work Through Trauma

Photo by Ingrid Santana from Pexels

Trauma is often the root cause of anxiety, depression, mental illness, and addiction. 

Unfortunately, trauma isn’t something we can think our way out of. Being educated on what trauma is and the treatment options available can make a big difference on the path to recovery.

Kelsey is a Canadian Certified Counsellor with a Masters in Counseling Psychology from the University of Victoria. She runs her private practice focused on trauma therapy and anxiety, that offers in-person and online sessions. Her passion for helping those with trauma was first born out of her own experiences with mental health and anxiety.

I asked Kelsey some BIG questions about what trauma is, how it affects behavior, and what techniques are used to work through it. 

Kelsey also provided valuable resources where you can learn more about each topic. 

“What I have learned about trauma, anxiety, emotional regulation, and mental health has changed my life and the way I understand myself and my emotional states.”

Kelsey Mech

Please keep in mind we are talking about trauma, so tread carefully if you might be impacted by this content.

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What is trauma?
How does trauma affect the brain and behavior?
How does therapy help manage the effects of trauma?
What techniques are used to treat trauma?
How is EMDR used to treat trauma?
What resources do you often share with people you counsel?

Identifying Trauma: What is trauma?

As mental health gains more attention, specific terms like “trauma” can often be misused. Kelsey clears the air by defining trauma while also being sensitive to cases that fall outside the clinical definition.

“It’s important that we don’t call everything traumatic because that diminishes the experiences of people who have had impactful traumas in their life. But, it’s also important not to diminish anyone’s experience of upsetting incidents.”

Kelsey Mech

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders (DSM) defines trauma as death, threatened death, actual or threatened serious injury, or actual or threatened sexual violence, in the following way(s):

  • Direct exposure – it’s happening to you
  • Witnessing the trauma – you see it happening to someone else 
  • Learning about a relative or close friend’s exposure to a trauma
  • Indirect exposure to details of the trauma – someone telling you about something traumatic that happened to them.

Kelsey reflects that the DSM is “flawed and imperfect in many ways.” Trauma that is more cumulative and nuanced gets missed with this technical definition.

“I often see childhood trauma overtime where smaller incidents of emotional or verbal abuse, or significant neglect, can have the same or even more negative impact on an individual than a single traumatic incident,” Kelsey explains.

Experiencing Trauma: How does trauma affect the brain and behavior?

Everybody experiences trauma differently. Kelsey outlines the broad impact of traumatic experiences that are not processed correctly. 

“There are many layers to this question, but the most important part is recognizing that it [trauma] gets in the way of our ability to feel safe. The experience of a traumatic event can overwhelm our capacity to cope.”

Kelsey Mech 

Traumatic energy can get stuck in the body if it isn’t processed properly, leading to a continual sense that things are unsafe.

Memories can bubble up feelings of powerlessness and other intense emotions that occurred at the time of the event(s). 

Trauma can lead to symptoms of Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) which include:

  • Flashbacks 
  • Intrusive memories 
  • Hypervigilance – the sense of always watching your back
  • Avoidance
  • Isolation
  • Over-reactivity

Kelsey explains that we can also develop negative cognitions or thoughts like “It was my fault,” “I am powerless,” or “I am damaged.” These negative thoughts can influence how we see ourselves and limit us as we try to move forward from the event. 

Recovering from Trauma: How does therapy help manage the effects of trauma?

Unfortunately, trauma isn’t something we can think our way out of. If you have experienced trauma and are dealing with ongoing symptoms, trauma counseling with a certified professional in your area or online can be hugely beneficial. 

Working through the trauma and processing it in a healthy way can help make sense of what happened and allow you to live more fully in the present.

“When we can start to build a sense of awareness of our physical selves while processing trauma cognitively, we can learn that those memories no longer pose a real threat.”

Kelsey Mech

Kelsey suggests that therapy should include in two steps. 

  1. process traumatic events by retrieving painful memories 
  2. use techniques that allow clients to feel safe in their bodies and emotions in the present moment

Look for a therapist trained in EMDR, somatic experiencing, or sensorimotor psychotherapy. 

Recovering from Trauma: What techniques are used to treat trauma?

The two most prominent techniques used to process trauma are Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Somatic Experiencing. 

“Both of these [EMDR and Somatic Experiencing] help clients to access their physical and emotional reactions to trauma. They help clients complete the stress cycle to release the stored up energy from the trauma and make sense of what happened.”

Kelsey Mech

Supportive techniques and self practices recommended by Kelsey include: 

  • Practices like meditation that cultivate mindfulness and self-awareness help you notice emotions and your body’s reaction to them. Awareness and acceptance of uncomfortable feelings in a safe environment are healing. 
  • Deep breathing and other grounding tools help regulate your nervous system. 
  • Cognitive skills that reframe thinking and focus on the present moment can stop the feedback loop of traumatizing memories. 
  • Connect with the inner child and ensuring that the child’s needs are being met now – something therapists call “re-parenting.” This technique is particularly helpful if the trauma happened in childhood, 
  • Safe social connection with other people is also a vital component of restoring a sense of safety. 
  • Exercise, including yoga, and various forms of bodywork like massage and acupuncture can also help clients to complete the stress cycles they are stuck in naturally.

Recovering from Trauma: How is EMDR used to treat trauma?

Kelsey further explains EMDR as a “…tool that can help people reduce the impact of experiences, often traumatic ones, from the past that intrude on present-day life. EMDR can also be helpful for people dealing with anxiety and panic, grief, and other strong emotional reactions.”  

EMDR involves exploring the negative beliefs, feelings, and physical sensations associated with the traumatic incident. 

Feelings and beliefs, along with the memory itself, are explored during what’s called bilateral processing. The client either uses their eyes to track the therapist’s fingers moving back and forth or holds buzzers that vibrate alternately in their hands. 

Bilateral stimulation allows the brain to access natural processes that help remove the distress response from memory. 

You can read a bit more about EMDR here

Resources for Trauma: What resources do you often share with people you counsel?

Kelsey excitedly replies, “I share a lot of bite-sized information about trauma, and other mental health concerns, on my Instagram, @kelseymech.” 

“I love the idea of simply making these types of conversations that I have with clients in the therapy room more available to everyone.”

Kelsey Mech 

Her newsletter signup on her website kelseymech.com shares more detailed long-form content – as well as updates about her blog articles, and upcoming online courses and podcast episodes. 

She recommends the two best books she knows on trauma for a deep dive from a somatic body-based perspective: 

  1. The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
  2. Waking the Tiger by Peter Levine 

If you are looking for more on-hands resources, Kelsey offers in-person and online counseling and coaching. 

Counseling is for processing trauma, exploring emotions, and learning how to cope with these emotions. She is registered to work with clients in most of Canada, the UK, and Australia. 

Coaching involves a focus on the future. Coaching packages are currently just for women. Kelsey explains, “Together, we strive to get to know the true you before the world told you who you “should” be. If you feel like you’ve been disconnected from yourself and want to find ways to live a life that is in alignment with your truest self, I’d love to coach you through that journey.”


About Kelsey Mech

Kelsey is a Canadian Certified Counsellor with a Masters in Counselling Psychology from the University of Victoria. She runs her own private practice that offers in-person and online sessions focused on both trauma therapy and anxiety. She specializes in “trauma-informed practice.” She is trained in EMDR, cognitive behavioral therapy, emotion-focused work, somatic approaches, and interpersonal/experiential modalities.

After struggling with her mental health (predominantly anxiety), she wanted to find a way to support others in similar situations. She started working on the frontlines with people struggling with homelessness and addictions. 

That first-hand experience taught her that trauma is the root of everything – addiction, anxiety, depression, mental illness, and more. She decided to get her masters. She developed a passion for working with trauma through those experiences and understanding the unique way it impacts our bodies and minds. 

You can find Kelsey at www.kelseymech.com and on Instagram at @kelseymech or by email at kelsey@kelseymech.com.

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