Finding Peace in the Present

Story Shared for #MyMindOurStory by Alberto

Reach out to Alberto via email here.

I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. The first time it happened, I did not know what it was. I just knew that I felt great anguish that did not diminish with anything. This anguish caused me a great depression, which led me to go to the psychiatrist.

I was medicated with anxiolytics and antidepressants for a good while until I felt better and arbitrarily decided to cut the therapy. After stopping these actions, my symptoms came back after a while and this time with more force.

I had to return to the psychiatrist whom I thought as the only solution to my problem. The medication had its effect and I felt good again for at least 3 years, with peace of mind thanks to the medication.

I had the courage to divorce and soon start a new love relationship. Everything was going well in my life, I felt happy and believed that I could fight against the world. I felt so good and so stable that the doctor decided to suspend the medication.

However, after 2 years, my new relationship failed. I fell back into anxiety, panic attacks, depression and this time accompanied by insomnia and other physical diseases. I felt totally devastated. I decided not to go to the psychiatrist because I learned that the medication only attacks the symptoms and not the cause of the problem, the mind.

I discovered mindfulness meditation, paying attention to the present moment, and it was a great revelation, a light at the end of the tunnel. Anxiety is an excess of the future. The disciplined practice of Mindfulness helped me to be focused on the present moment, where everything happens and where one is safe and finds peace. This practice also helped me to lower my alertness and therefore insomnia, control panic attacks and decrease anxiety levels.

I can not say that I have overcome it 100% but I am on the path of healing. I also complement the practice of meditation with Yoga postures. This combination helps me a lot to calm the mind, breathe and manage the stressful events of my life without generating more anxiety or more panic attacks.

I am calmer now because I know that the mind, with its illusory and uncontrolled thoughts, is what causes my anxiety. I discovered that I am not my mind and I can prevent thoughts from controlling me since I have a great tool to deal with it. I hope this story can help more people to overcome this terrible condition called anxiety.

Read more #MyMindOurStory shares here.